Loving B&W

For some reason, I have been loving the way my pictures look in black and white lately. Here are a few that I took of my boys yesterday. If any of you know my little Jackson, you know that sharing really isn't his strong suit. So, imagine my surprise when he went over to his brother with his favorite toys and said, "Share with baby Carter." It just makes me want to sing when I see how much these two already love each other!

Simplicity

This week's project 52 theme was simplicity. I love how these themes are really making me think and be creative. They can be interpreted so many different ways, and it has been fun to view how other photographers' chose to interpret the theme each week.

It is so amazing to me that, no matter how many times this sweet little boy wakes me up at night, all he has to do is simply smile at me and my heart melts. I am such a sucker for my little boys' smiles.

and just for good measure, here are some other pictures from this morning's photo shoot with my oh so cute 3 month old!

Imperfect

Project 52 week 4

My husband and I are building a wonderful life together. It is filled with love, joy, fun, and laughter with a little sadness and frustration mixed in. Being young parents while attending medical school sure isn't easy. I think this blogger summed it up perfectly with this poem:

The Resident’s Wife

I miss you.
My companion. Love. Friend.
You’re never here.
But then you are, but not you.
Hollow. Lights dimmed.
Stress.
Fatigue.
Exhaustion.
Physically, mentally, and emotionally drained.
Then pieces of you shine through,
And I have renewed hope.
Then you’re gone again.
The sign above our bed taunts me daily,
“P.S. I love your laughter,
And I love the way you make me laugh.”
We did laugh once, right?
I miss you.

My life seems busy. But not.
I fill it with things to help me feel busy.
It pails in comparison to your daily dread.
Fighting, disobedient kids.
Dinner to cook.
Laundry. Groceries. Bills.
A house to clean.
Schedules to keep.

Monotonous? Yes.
Dull? Possibly.
Frustrating? Sometimes.

But there’s no one looking over my shoulder,
Watching my moves and critiquing my care.
No one waiting for me to make a mistake
And ready to sue.
Or criticize at my first falter.
No one competing with me to impress.
Well, maybe a few.
But only rarely do I have the fear that
I might mess up and truly ruin a life.
For a doctor, that fear is omnipresent.
Babies to deliver. Watching new life. And first breaths.
But also seeing death.
Suffering and grief.
Pain. And sorrow. And Fear.

Isolation.

Wounds to treat. Patients to heal.
Paperwork.
Paperwork.
Paperwork.
Notes.
Notes.
Notes.

You’re tired, so I’m tired.
If you’re miserable, I must be miserable, too.
Why should I be happy when my other half appears ruined?
“Just a few more weeks. Then a new rotation.”
“Just a few more years, then residency will be over.”
Will it be better?
Worth it?
At what cost?
The kids have stopped asking if you’ll be home for dinner.
I miss you.

You’re jealous of me. I get to have a hobby. And exercise.
Does it make you love me less?
Are you angry when the house isn’t clean?
When you wake at 3:50 am,
Do you stand over me lovingly?
Or do you resent that my alarm will be silent for another 3 hours?
I resent it for you.

Four days off per month is criminal.
80 hours? Ha.
Paperwork not included.

Holidays have no meaning.
Just another time to be reminded that other families are together.
Like weekends.
I only look for 4 chairs at church.
Remember church?
But you and I, we are still faithful at saying our prayers.
Do they count if you fall asleep during them?
And when you’re away, our prayers here always include,
“Please let daddy have a good day at work.
Please help him be a good doctor and to be happy.”
And I silently beg and plead that you will not fall asleep while driving.
The kids include, “Please let him come home early.”
And, “We miss him.”
They know.
I miss you.

No days off this week.
But we will savor those minutes from 7:15 to 8:15 pm
That the children have to jump on you and love you.
And I will try again to make you laugh.
And then watch you sleep.
And pray again that somehow He will make 6 hours
Of rest be sufficient for your tired body.

It will get better.
It will be worth it. It has to be.
I’m so proud of you.
Do I tell you enough? Do you believe me?
I know other people need you.
They need your naturally skilled hands.
They need the knowledge you’ve worked years to acquire.
They need your comfortable, easy attitude and manner.
They love you, too.
I will share.
But I miss you.

Our life and love aren't perfect, but it's OUR life and OUR love, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Saturday Fun

I bought this blow-up ball pit for Jackson for his 1st birthday. It has been deflated and under my bed for about six months now, so when I got it out for him today he thought it was the coolest thing ever! Apparently, instead of buying new toys, all we need to do is hide his old ones for a few months :)

Man I love this kid!

Inspiration

Week three of my 52 week photo challenge was a little tough for me. It took me a few days to solidify what I wanted to photograph to represent this week's theme: "inspiration."

The scriptures are filled with inspiring women who were amazing wives and mothers. Being a mother to two boys, I especially love the story in Alma (The Book of Mormon) about the stripling warriors who were taught obedience by their mothers. I hope I can teach my sons in a way that they can grow up to become great men.
I also have so many excellent examples of wives and mothers in my own life. My own mother, my mother-in-law, my sisters-in-law, and my friends are all such wonderful people. They inspire me to be more loving, more kind, more patient, and more understanding with my husband and children. I am so blessed to have such inspiring women in my life!

Day at the Firestation

Today, for our playgroup, we got to go tour a firestation! I was so excited to bring Jackson because he LOVES firetrucks. Well, he loved it alright. So much that he didn't hold still for one second, ran around like a crazy person, and pretty much embarassed the heck out of me. I guess when we look back on these pictures in the future, I can tell him that today was the day I almost left him at a firestation :)

Did this face make all the embarassment worth it? Almost.

Life

This week's project 52 theme is "life." As soon as I heard this week's theme I knew exactly what I wanted to take a picture of. I didn't even have to think twice about it!

This is my life. I am a stay-at-home mom first, photographer second. My kids mean everything to me! Most of the time my house has toys strewn all over it, and half the time by the end of the day my two-year-old has shed his clothes. To an outsider it may look like chaos (and sometimes it is!) but I wouldn't change it for the world!

Little Miss A- Rice University- Houston, TX

This firey little red-head just turned two!

We had a great time playing with balloons and having a tea party.

What a fun afternoon!

Oh, what do you do in the winter time?

We ride bikes outside in shortsleeves :)

Little Angel

This is Carter

He is my perfect little angel.

I couldn't have asked for a better baby.

A boy and his trucks

This is Jackson

He is a lover of all things "boy." Especially trucks.

And I love this big smile.

Resolution

I am so excited for this project that I have decided to participate in this year! My good friend/blogger/photographer posted about it on her blog and I thought it was a wonderful way to improve my photography skills and take a bunch of pictures that aren't necessarily of people this year. My 4 Hens Photography has come up with a 52 week photography challenge that will have a different theme for each week. This week's theme is "resolution."

My resolution this year is to work on ME. I want to become more patient, more kind, a better wife/mother, more spiritual, a better photographer--basically I want to improve in every aspect of my life, and this means spending more time with myself. I have resolved to take a few minutes out of each day and do something to better myself.
What is your new year's resolution?

If you would like to participate in this 52 week photography challenge go here to read more about it!